Mile 0.2: This song is awful. It's the anti-running song. I bet that's why this hurts so much. I'm changing it.
Mile 0.5: I'm going to die. This has never been so hard. I'm a wuss.
Mile 0.6: I bet this is so miserable because my hair is in a ponytail. I should have put it in a clip and I bet it would have made this bearable.
Mile 0.7: Finally, a song that is worth a damn...
Mile 0.8: I'm quitting this tomorrow. It sucks. Hmmm...I think the things that used to hurt are now just numb. I bet I hate this because of my shoes. Maybe I need new shoes...
Mile 1.0: HOW THE HELL DID HILLARY DUFF GET ON MY iPOD?!
Mile 1.2: I'm so pissed I'm just going to keep going so I can get this horror movie over with. If they would please put more street lights on this God foresaken street, I know I would be less miserable...
Mile 1.3: Endorphins my butt. Why do my arms hurt? OMG- seriously? Am I seriously jogging in rhythm to "Bop to the Top" as sung by "Sharpey" and "Ryan"?
Mile 1.4: Another anti-jogging song. If I was a rock star I sure as hell wouldn't be running down this street like an idiot. I'd be running in my personal gym with a personal trainer after the nanny gets here.
I stopped at Mile 1.6 because I was home again. You girls have to be The Best Ever. I seriously thought I was going to come out of the closet as a "hater" and get all sorts of comments that would cause me to screen comments before they are posted. Instead, you agree with me! You're a bunch of haters too! And Jennifer, I forgive you for the 3 miles because you convinced me that you might hate it as much as I do.
So, all you haters...what songs do I need to replace the anti-running songs with on the ipod? Hillary has got to go (still not sure how she got on there but I know One Fish is involved somehow). Jimmy inspires me to have a drink, but nosomuch to jog, so he's not going to be making the playlist. Sexy Back has made the list, as has Crazy in Love, and about 20 others. Help!
6 comments:
Nell, you are brilliant..write a book already so I can buy it.
YOU ARE HILARIOUS! I am so on the same page about the running friends thing.... That's why I just watch them run by my house every morning, whilst I drink my warm coffee.
you forget i have been running for 5 years. so 3 miles aint so good afterall, is it? and here is my list...but don't judge me. they keep me moving at a good pace. i do not allow my children to listen and i don't play this at my dinner parties (which i don't actually have anymore but i iike the way it sounds).
eminem- Lose yourself (edited, of course)and the real slim shady (which matt lauer likes) ;Finger Eleven-Paralyzer; cupid- cupid shuffle; pink-there you go; Kardinal Offishall- Dangerous; FloRida- Low; Nickelback-Rockstar;Katy Perry-HOt and cold; Justin Timberlake-sexyback; Fergie-big girls don't cry;
now this is no guarantee. the running still stinks. but sometimes i feel like i am 22 in da club...until i get that cramp at mile .6. have fun.
YOU CAN DO THIS!!!! and when you sign up for the marathon i will take you off my LIKE list.
As per always...Crazy Bitch by Buck Cherry will make you run your arse off...literally.
This absolutely MADE MY DAY! Seriously. I HATE running. I'm trying a new workout that I think I hate almost as much as running, which I didn't think was possible. People must be lying when they say they enjoy it. They have to be. I'm going to remember this post when I'm complaining during my workout tonight!! Thanks:)
Our favorite running song here is I'm Going to Knock You Out--LL Cool J. I also like Pink (especially Pill), Rihanna, Eminem, Black Eyed Peas. Can't you run on the beach there--that is fun--right?
STK
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